Letter 29

Hey Dad!
How are you? I feel bad I'm writing less and less. But it's just for now. The past two weeks I've been very en edge and depressed. Well we got our grades from the exams and I'm extremely relieved. I thought I failed at every single subject. But it turns out i only have two grades under the average which I am currently working on. But in my report card they made a mistake on my economy exam and forgot to add 2.25pts but they can't fix their mistake. They're gonna add the 2.25 on my next test. Apparently, this year, the first trimester is the hardest. If that's the case, then I'm happy I survived through it. It's weird, last year in the literary subjects i wouldn't dream on getting over 8 out of 20 but this year my grades shot up to 11. I should now push myself a bit more in the sciences to get better grades and to insure I can go into the S (scientifique -> filière). Then I'll review my choice better to decide if I would want to transfer to L (Litteraire -> filière). I quite stressed about my future. It's so unnerving that i have to make an important choice that will affect my future decisions. Worst off all, I'm supposed to decide and i have no clue what I want to do. I know I'm not really supposed to know where I'm heading because nobody ever figures that out early. But what if I get bored? What if I'm not good enough? What if what I want to do is very broad? Okay so I'm starting to ramble and I'm getting tired of this subject it's constantly in the back of my mind.
Anyway. I'm extremely tired and i really need to sleep. Tomorrow me and mom are heading to check out Batroun house and see where the progress arrived and I'll update you on the house.
Love you so much my daddy!
I miss you every single day.
Kisses from home.
Symz

Letter 10

Hey Dad!
How are you? How can you decide on your future? I went to an American university conference at school. The guy talked about the majors and the steps to apply and all the options. I actually got scared. I'm so lost. I have no idea where i want to end up. I very aware that i can change whenever i want to. But still it's a BIG decision. Finally my choice is who I'll be in society. Everybody tells me that it's still quite early to know where you want to end up but it's constantly on my mind. I'm scared that I'll start with something and then get bored of it and would want to change. I can see myself as a marine biologist or work at an advertising company. There are so many thing i want to try out but my life is not infinite. I can't do everything. What's even worse it's that i want to have a family too... Maybe I'm thinking too far ahead... People have a very idyllic image of their future: a big house, a perfect wife with perfect kids, a comfortable amount of money and a perfect job. But how many achieve it? How many people reach their goal? Life is hard.
I love you so so much!
Your youngest daughter that misses you.
Kisses